Get Him To Commit: 3 Things He Might Say to Avoid Moving Things Forward
Let’s cut to the chase: You can’t push a man into commitment.
If you're feeling a hollow yearning as the man you love dodges your hints at deeper commitment, know that this is a common predicament many women face. A fitting metaphor I encountered recently describes relationship dynamics aptly: In a relationship, the man is the gas pedal, and the woman, the brake.
This suggests that a man will pace the relationship as it suits him, while a woman can either slow things down or exit if progress stalls. If she tries to move the needle herself, he becomes distant.
So, if you notice that he is avoiding the direction you want the relationship to go, you may be accelerating while he’s braking. If so, here’s what you may hear him saying and what you can do about it to get the commitment you want:
1. “Things are good right now; let’s just see where it goes.”
If this is his line, he’s content because his needs are met, but what about yours? Men understand that commitment introduces new responsibilities. If he's stalling, it's time for you to apply the brakes. 👉 Don’t shut down; merely become less readily available to him. He'll notice your absence, which can inspire him to secure a more permanent place for you in his life.
2. “Marriage is just a formality; why involve the government in our personal lives?”
This excuse is a classic avoidance of accountability. Commitment requires a high level of personal integrity and maturity. It's easy to shy away from the challenges of truly understanding and supporting another person.
👉 To inspire support without applying pressure, invite him into your world by sharing your personal feelings: "When I think of marriage, I feel a deep sense of commitment and security, which is incredibly important to me. It’s not merely a legal document; it’s a celebration of love and dedication. This commitment offers a foundation to grow and support each other's dreams. Are you open to seeing it in a new light?"
This approach fosters open dialogue and helps him understand your perspective. If resistance persists and your values do not align, consider the importance of your desires and possibly reassess the relationship, as true commitment should resonate with your deepest visions of love.
3. “I’m still figuring out what I want in life and a relationship.”
Recognize that there are two types of proactive, mature men: one who will develop his life and relationship simultaneously and another who waits until everything is perfect before inviting his queen into a ready-made life. If he’s the latter, appreciate his ambitions, but understand you may not want to wait indefinitely.
👉 “I admire your ambition and desire for clarity, although I doubt I will still be around by then because I know what I am looking for. I’m ready to meet my soulmate and build a wonderful life together.”
In wrapping up, remember the metaphor; the man is the gas pedal, and the woman is the brake in a relationship. If you find yourself pushing for more speed toward commitment while he’s tapping the brakes, it might be time to reconsider the dynamics. You will inspire commitment from the right man by making your desire your priority, not the man. This is how you get to work the brakes instead of pushing the gas pedal. So, my love, take a leap of faith for future self. Get out of the situationship that you are in, and open the way for the man who isn’t afraid to move the car forward.
You deserve that. ❤️
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