I may still be single if I had not discovered this...
Love took a long time to show up.
I know I am not the only one for whom this is true, especially as I look at the responses from my latest questionnaire around the challenges women are having with men, love, and dating.
(Click the link to participate.☺️)
Love is one of our most tender life experiences. When I asked about the challenges, the responses revealed that women are having trouble.
When it comes to love, we struggle with balancing career and personal life, connecting on a deeper level, finding compatible partners, running out of time, feeling frustrated with men, fearing being hurt again, geography, being stuck on ex's, and not having dates.
I know this list is not exhaustive, but it can feel overwhelming.
I know the feelings of doubt, fear, and constriction around love and belonging.
Most of the time, we are too busy to address problems like these or don't know where to start.
I would say I fell into it sort of by accident.
It began simply. It started by...witnessing.
Witnessing...
the feeling of my feet on the earth.
The quality and depth of my breath.
The holding patterns in my body.
The thoughts I was thinking.
The choices I was making.
And the beliefs I held about myself, men, and life.
Through witnessing, I began shifting out of autopilot, where I allowed love to "just happen" to me.
Autopilot constantly disappointed me when the "love" that happened to me never matched the dream of "real love" alive in my heart. Still, this new habit of witnessing my internal and external experiences initiated a transformation I didn't even realize was happening then.
I recently read Dr. Nicole LePera's book How to Meet Yourself, and she said it so simply: "Consciousness is the basis for all transformation."
Was I choosing consciousness as a pathway to find my soulmate? No. My soulmate came as a fruit of my consciousness practice.
Some of you may be familiar with consciousness practices, and some may not be as familiar.
Consciousness is simple. It asks that you notice your thoughts, feelings, and body sensations without judgment or needing to change what you see.
This simple practice opened worlds of understanding for me.
It helped me see two things: the ever-changing flow of my thoughts, feelings, and sensations, and the un-changing light of awareness that held space for it all to exist.
I discovered that this essential understanding was the love relationship between the divine feminine and the sacred masculine within.
It all starts within.
Change happens from within, not by force but by nature.
By noticing my thoughts and beliefs that had me stuck on problems, I also began to hear divine whispers.
I could hear an inner guidance. It wasn't some grandiose change of consciousness but a subtle shift that came as quiet nudges and realizations. It came in messages, inspirations, signs, and synchronicities that took me where I needed to go to heal the feelings, thoughts, and beliefs that kept me stuck outside of love.
I began softening my grip on the problems and participating in the transformation.
I started trusting the process.
A new understanding began to emerge. I realized that if I believed I was the one to make love happen—through my personal will—I would continue to suffer.
If I kept aligning with the divine vision in my heart, everything had its purpose and perfect timing. (Even the problems and the wait).
I stopped trying to change my outer world and started changing my inner world. I stopped waiting and began preparing for the love I had dreamed of.
This is how I did it.
Now it's your turn.
✨Start getting ready for real love.✨
Here's how you can CREATE THE LIFE OF YOUR DREAMS.
If you have a friend at their rope’s end with dating, share this with her if you think it could be helpful.
Love always,
Kristin